I sat down at the keyboard, with what many may call a shamefully small glass of wine, to write my nightly journaling and I had an idea. We will get to the idea shortly, but I feel I need to set the stage for what is to come. I have recently started seeing what many may reference as a therapist, but he is a trusted friend to me.
From the outside world I seem to have things mostly together; perfect family, positive outlook on life, and energetically driven. Internally I am screaming for a life preserver. My negative self talk has me drowning in what is considered life. A series of rejections lead my path to reaching out to my friend, we will call him Mervin, for help. In my second “session” with Mervin he complemented me on my journaling and writing. Although the English language and writing has never been my strong point, I find writing to be very therapeutic.
That is when my idea came. What if instead of journaling I write my feelings and ideas into a blog format. A collaboration of words strung together to formulate something that briefly represents my life, the things that run thought my head on a daily basis, and the wishes I wish someone would have told me. This manuscript will probably always remain on my computer with no audience to read. It is my journey and my thoughts. If documenting them down allows me to see my feelings in black and white and process them. Then this is what I will do. So going forward you will see bits and pieces as I work towards a better me. Wish me luck.